(Click on the player at the top to listen to this ten-minute episode)
Whatever We Pay Attention to Is What Will Grow
People across the United States have been experiencing extreme winter weather lately. There have been tornadoes, heavy rains, bitter cold, ice storms, strong winds, and record snow storms. We know this as we have been running Zoom Wellness Circles lately with people living through all of these different types of weather. We have people from VA, WI, NY, CA, NC, OR, FL, MD, and UT in one we are running now, and everyone is talking about the challenging weather they are experiencing this winter.
One group member shared the quote, "If you choose not to find joy in the snow, you will have less joy in your life but still the same amount of snow." While this may seem a stretch if we are experiencing truly dangerous weather, we like the spirit of this quote. It fits with a quote that runs throughout our resources: "Whatever we pay attention to is what will grow."
If we give most of our attention to our complaints (weather or otherwise) our negative energy will grow. If we pay attention to what we are grateful for, to what brings us joy (including road crews, utility workers, first responders, and others who help restore services after a storm), that will grow as well.
Here are some other examples of paying attention and the results we can get:
If we pay attention and praise good behavior in a child, we will likely see more of that behavior.
If we pay attention to and appreciate someone's efforts to face a challenging situation, we may increase their self-confidence and commitment to keep working to overcome their challenge.
If we really pay attention to some habit we want to change, we will be more likely to make that change.
If we pay attention to the kindness of another, by expressing our gratitude and appreciation, we encourage more acts of kindness.
When we pay extra attention to someone we care about, we make them feel cared about, and we grow the relationship.
You can probably think of additional examples from your own life of how "What we pay attention to grows," and we encourage you to do so.
We also encourage you to test out the truth of this principle by making a concerted effort, in the days and weeks to come, to go out of your way, and to pay attention to something or someone in your life that you would like to enhance.
Give that part of your life more attention in the next few weeks and see what happens. Most likely, that area of your life will grow, no matter the weather.
Sign up for Your Weekly Wellness Compass to receive weekly an email each week that announces when a new podcast episode has been released and also includes a transcription of the episode for those who prefer to read instead of listen. Each episode is designed to help you for navigate your week ahead with clear attention and intention.
ABOUT THE CREATORS:
Holly Hughes Stoner, LMFT and Scott Stoner, LMFT, are both licensed marriage and family therapists who are partners in life and in work. They are the Co-Directors and Co-Creators of the Wellness Compass Initiative, a non-profit initiative that crates preventative wellness materials for adults, families, and teens. They live in Madison, Wisconsin and are the parents of three adult children and are blessed with two grandchildren, as well.